Having worked with clients with out-of-control sexual behavior (OCSB), and having spent several years during my training working with clients with chemical addictions, I have found the term sex addiction is at best a misnomer and at worst a mistake. Sex Addiction V. High Sex Drive One challenge with the term sex addiction is that…
I have alluded to the fact that my sexual values as a person and as a therapist have changed over time. I thought that it might spark interest to have me identify which values I have cut over the years. This may be of value because it will show that I don’t hold these beliefs…
Sexual adaptability is formed on the principle that no aspect of life stays the same forever. Just as our exercise routines might change as we age, so too might our sexuality. It is also based on the principle that no matter what fantasies a person or couple might share, their lived sexuality takes place in…
Generativity is one of my favorite sexual values. It directly relates to my joy in helping clients with their sexual issues and it is the value that I see most easily left behind as people try to navigate their relationships and their sexuality. By generativity, I am referring to the way that expressing sexuality, in…
Sexual Values: Sustainability In the last blog entry, I described the elements of consent as a sexual value. In this entry, I am describing the value of sustainability. However, I realized that I have not explicitly stated the importance I place on whether or not these values are sensitive to diversity. I believe strongly in…
Sexual Values: Consent In this blog entry, I will identify the elements that I think comprise full consent. Just remember, these values and my ways of understanding them are conversation starters only. I hold these values loosely, and I could at any moment encounter something that requires me to reevaluate them. If I brought this…
Sexual Values: One Therapist’s Provisional Set In the United States when the word “values” is used in the media, it is often being used by people with conservative religious or political values as a code word for “the way people who look like me and think like me do things and the way I want…