Therapy for Polyamory / Nonmonogamy

Some people came to this page because you’re already polyamorous and you’re looking for therapy for polyamory that can work with your current practice. I’m going to ask those folks to skip down to the “I’m Already Practicing Polyamory/Nonmonogamy” while I address the poly curious and newbies first

I’m Considering Polyamory/Nonmonogamy

Considering therapy for polyamory possibilities

When you first grasp the possibility of polyamory, it can feel both scary and exciting. Your prior sources of security feel like they’re crumbling under your feet. It is easy to imagine a wicked world of relationships where everyone does whatever they want without regard for others. For many, these fears are balanced against positive possibilities as well. You may imagine a life of multiple loves, where pressure lifts as everyone’s needs are met by more than one person. Therapy for polyamory can sort fact from fiction, choice from inevitability, and put you at the helm of creating the vision for your relationship future that feels more promising than unstable.

Opening a Monogamous Relationship

If you’re considering therapy for polyamory because your currently monogamous (or unfaithful) partner is asking to open the relationship, you have a lot of reasonable fears. Is the therapist just going to support their point of view? I’ve helped many couples consider opening their relationship. The reluctant partners often comment that they feel safe and supported with me as I hold their partner accountable for going slow, healing betrayals, and try to prioritize healing before opening.

I’m Already Practicing Polyamory/Nonmonogamy

When your love style plots a different path than many therapists are used to, you face a tough choice. Will you go to therapy only to pay to educate the therapist about consensual nonmonogamy or hide your multiple loves? You shouldn’t have to explain your love-style on your dime. You shouldn’t have to hide.

I am ready to hit the ground running with you, just like I would be with a monogamous couple next door. I have experience providing therapy for polyamory in individual, couples, and triad therapy. I am willing and ready to work with most poly systems.

I am very knowledgeable about poly and experienced in providing therapy where the client(s) is/are poly. I’ve read a lot about poly; have experience serving poly individuals, couples, dyads, and vees; have spoken at conferences about poly (specifically agreements and issues for therapists); and trained therapists to work with poly clients. There is still a lot that I am learning just given how diverse these relationships can be, but I’m dedicated to continuing my education on my time not yours, and I have an ample consultation to guide me in that process.

But Dr. Eric, Are You Poly?

Yes, I’ve been with my first partner since 1997 and with my second partner since late 2016. We cohabitate and practice kitchen-table poly. Because I know what it takes to make polyamorous relationships stable, I can be a tough-but-fair therapist for people who are struggling to open or are already open and suffering through instability.

It’ll be a lot easier for me to help you do it more skillfully from the beginning than to help you put the pieces back together after people get hurt. Contact Me.